My Top Ten Ways to Fix the Government Shut Down
10. Pay all Congressmen and Presidential Staff in Monopoly Money.
9. Really shut down the government....really!
8. Only pay those who are non-congressional employees.
7. Fire all Congressmen and Senators and employ them as security guards at war memorials waiting to be visited by angry veterans.
6. Threaten to make all members of the House and Senate look at pictures of Nancy Pelosi without make-up and in a bikini.
5. Send them all to China, Russia, Mongolia, the Antarctic....anywhere!
4. Make them all work for free in a day-care center...I mean after all, they all act like toddlers anyway.
3. Threaten to take away John Boehner’s supply of visine real tears.
2. Fire the entire bunch of idiots, cancel their pensions, and hold new elections in 60 days....with no previous office holders allowed to run.
1. Why fix the government? We seem to be doing ok without it!